To Hug or Not To Hug--Oregon Schools Ban Hugging

FoxNews reports that at least two middle schools in Eastern Oregon have put in place rules that no longer permit students to hug each other during school. At least one student, a repeat offender, has already been punished with detention for finding her boyfriend too irresistible.

I don't know about your teenagers, but my teenage daughters (#2 & #3) are huggy, huggier and huggiest! They hug their friends, both boys and girls, all the time. There is no sexual tension involved in any of this "physical contact." It is simply an expression of affection and friendship.

We even give hugs at church on Sunday mornings! Adults, children and youth are always hugging each other for one reason or another.

I confess that there have been times when two teenagers have hugged in a boyfriend-girlfriend manner that lasted a moment or two or.....well....maybe a lot too long given the setting. It is this that makes others uncomfortable.

Young people need to be taught that such unrestrained expressions of public, romantic, physical bonding are selfish acts that embarrass others. It is a sign of failure in our homes, our communities and our schools when we can no longer discipline our children's bad behavior without banning their good, natural and normal behavior along with it.

Schools should set a firm policy on appropriate vs. inappropriate expressions of affection on campus. There is nothing wrong with a kiss or a hug of greeting between friends, whether they are "going steady" or "romantically involved" or not. But such actions must be kept short....and to the point!

One girl at our local high school was called into the principal's office for making the mistake of exchanging a long, passionate kiss with her boyfriend in the wrong place at the wrong time......right up against the window of the principal's office! The parents of that girl told her that the principal was right and she was wrong. And she learned a good lesson that day.

Banning hugging in schools is an admission of failure. Teenagers are teachable, they are still young enough to learn a new trick or two. Call an assembly. Send letters home to parents. Teach proper etiquette of appropriate behavior that conforms with community standards endorsed by the parents. Set clear, firm standards for personal behavior and enforce them.

But don't ban hugging!